Some people are born great, others achieve it through a life of struggling and hardship.
I was born in a dreary council house on an anonymous estate in a humdrum town, my mother didn't die during my birth and went on to have three more children. I wasn't used, abused or bullied growing up. I didn't excel academically or athletically I just plodded my way through school and then sixth form and then into a job at the same factory my dad had worked at since leaving school himself.
To say I was stuck in a rut is the understatement of the century.
And that's when I saw him, well heard of him anyway.
Manman and his valiant attempts to right the worlds wrongs, the press loved him. This idiot in a balaclava, breaking up petty drug deals, patrolling the streets, waving his cape around like he is all that.
I hated him, I hated him with a passion and knew what I had to do, what I had to become. I finally found my purpose.
I became his polar opposite, I was the reaction to his action, I am his nemesis, the dark to his light, the yin to his yang, I am Badman!
I know it's not the catchiest of names but you know where you stand with me and thats important.
I started small, putting cats in trees, bursting little kids balloons, taking candy off babies, general villainy you know? But as his do-gooding gets bigger, braver and bolder I also have to up my game.
I needed at least a henchman if not multiple henchmans or henchmen if you prefer.
I tried a few "friend finding" websites but hardly any of the people who applied were suitable, most of them don't even appear to own clothes.
Then I tried the local press but there was a snafu with the ad, and my number appeared alongside an Austin Allegro that only had 13k on the clock.
All that left me with was the notice boards in the supermarkets.
This, this .. this didn't work at all but I did get an exercise bike for £25.
As a last resort I roped in my brother, well he's my half brother really but everyone has to start somewhere don't they?
This is a lot harder than I thought it was going to be, I don't even have a masterplan yet, or a lair, what type of super villain doesn't even have a lair?
But mark my words I will terrorise this city and torment that masked meddling .... moron?
Alliteration was never my strong point.