Monday

White People Having Fun In Their Twenties (496 words)

A pop song by a band that will never make another record but will be remembered forevermore plays over a montage of ridiculously attractive people having fun.  These people don't exist but over the years you have witnessed so many light hearted, almost serious moments, that you find them popping into your head when almost similar moments happen in your life.

The show opens in the bar they all go to on a daily basis, in any other situation this would be a sign of co-dependent alcoholism. The loveable but naïve barman already knows what people will be drinking and their glasses are full and ready before they even enter the scene. Bizarrely money never seems to exchange hands.

The clever one comes in first; he is wearing a heavy winter coat, scarf, hat and gloves. He stamps his feet to shake the snow off his boots and delivers an overzealous "Brrrr boy it sure is cold out there!" announcement to make it perfectly clear to the live studio audience that it is meant to be winter.

He hangs his outdoor gear on the on the hooks you have never noticed before, sidles over to the bar and perches on the stool at the corner of the bar. The place he has sat since the pilot episode.

The stupid one comes in next; he is wearing shorts, a garish Hawaiian shirt and has sunglasses balanced on top of his head. He stamps his feet, shaking the snow from his sandals, hangs his sunglasses on the hooks and says "I need to get a coat!"

This sends the audience into fits of laughter

He walks over to sit next to the clever one, sees his full pint glass and grimaces. The barman sees this as askes him what the matter is.

Motioning towards his drink he says "Can I have two half pint glasses? … I'm trying to cut down on my drinking"

Cue a groan and more laughter from the audience.

Next in is the ditzy blonde, she rushes to the bar and orders a brandy, downs it in one.

The clever one says "Is everything ok Tess?"

She replies on the verge of tears. "No I've just seen Santa fall over on the ice, I tried to help him up and his beard came off, children started crying  ... he wasn't even the real one. What is the world coming to?"

This knocks the clever one for six and he mugs and shrugs to the camera, making the audience laugh.

The vague one comes rushing in, throws his coat off, missing the hooks completely and dances excitedly over to the group.

"Oh my god, best thing ever has just happened! I saw one of those store Santa's totally faceplant on the ice, kids were crying, his beard came off, it was A-MAY-ZING!"

This makes Tess descend into full blown sobbing, the clever one shoots him a look, the audience laughs.

End scene cut to commercials.

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