Who'd be a Warlock? by @neilsehmbhy (500 Words)

Shuffling forward as fast as the line would let her she bounced lightly on her toes to get a better look. It was no good. Whoever was standing in front of her was as tall as a giant and smelt like one too. Except giants were dead. Everyone knew that.

It turned out the monstrosity blocking her view was in fact a troll, explaining the smell.

'Next'. A voice called.

Petunia stepped forward nervously. 
'Name'? A very officious looking reptile sat behind a plain wooden desk handling a quill in its claws.

' Errm Petunia.' she whispered gently.

'What? Speak up! There's a queue don't you know.' The lizard tapped its claws impatiently.  Petunia looked at its nametag. Zvvbhar. Did that mean she was male or female?

Clearing her throat she opened her mouth wide like she had practiced and said 'Petunia Clark'.

'Better,' the lizard said primly pursing its lips. Definitely a female.'Speciality?'

' Warlock', replied Petunia glibly.

'A Warlock? You? Look stop messing around. You don't get girl Warlocks. Especially Dwarf ones. Those bumps on your chest aren't moobs you know?'

'But I am a Warlock.' Replied Petunia indignantly, her face flushed from embarrasment as she self consciously folded her arms across her chest.

Someone behind her in the queue said 'Stupid dwarf thinks shes a Warlock,' 

'Twat.' thought Petunia.

"Yeah? And I'm a dragon overlord," Zvvvhar said.

"No, seriously. I'm a flipping warlock. My whole family is. I can do stuff." Petunia said angrily.

"By stuff, you mean drinking ogre pee or smoking that green herb the goblins peddle? ' said Zvvvhar winking.

Petunia was bright red at this point and could feel heat radiating from her head.

'No magic and incantations.  Things like that.'she said through gritted teeth.

'Sure your not getting mixed up with Witches. Or Sorcerers. 
We did have a girl Sorceror once.  Think she was called Chloe or something.' The lizard looked up, her tongue flicking out to the side as she studied the girls face.

'I'm not a witch. I haven't got a wand see.'said Petunia waving her hands.

'I'm not a Sorceror either. I'm a Warlock.' Reaching behind her she pulled a long object off her back and carefully unwrapped it.

'I have a staff see? Got it off my Grandad.' Petunia gave the staff a little shake.

'Whoa there! Don't shake that in here! It looks like one I suppose. Prove it then.' Zvvvhar replied smugly.

'Prove it?' Petunia asked.

'Yeah do something Warlocky.' The lizard rasped.

'Right'. Petunia concentrated hard letting her emotions settle like her Grandad had told her. When the warmth and buzzing in her head got too much to hold, she released the energy through the staff aiming for Zvvvhar.


The smoke slowly settled and Zvvvhar had been replaced by a plastic teapot.

'Welcome to Winblem's school for magical creatures. Can you change me back now please? Squeaked Zvvvhar the teapot.

Petunia smiled triumphantly 'Sure no problem.'

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