Friday

Anger Management (449 Words)


"So, how have you been this week?"

Lying on the couch, our intrepid hero looks every bit the scared child he is. Kevin smiles nervously at the doctor. "I'm ok, "he lies.  

The doctor notes the lie, the first of the session and returns the smile. "And how is the new school?"

"It's alright, I've met a girl . . . "

"Well that's marvellous news," says the doctor scribbling in his notepad.

"She's a Dwarf."

The doctor glances up from his notes and silently looks at Kevin over the top of his half-moon glasses.

"Her great-great-Grandfather killed a wizard at the battle of Brebaroth; they are the only Dwarf family to become Warlocks as a result. Her dad doesn't really like me all that much to be honest."

Taking off his glasses and rubbing the bridge of his nose the doctor sighs. "Kevin, I thought we had covered this ground already, there is no such thing as magic. You must stop retreating into this fantasy world of your own creation."

Kevin's eyes flash red, "She isn't made up, her name is Petunia."

"And she's really a midget?" Asks the doctor incredulously.

Clenching his fists, trying to keep his rage in check Kevin glares at the doctor, "She's a Dwarf."

"And I suppose she carries an axe with her at all times?"

"No she has a staff; her grandfather gave it to her."

"The fella who killed a wizard?"

Springing off the couch, Kevin stands with his fists clenched by his side and shouts "NO THAT WAS HER GREAT-GREAT-GRANDFATHER."

A smile creeps over the doctor's face, "You're angry aren't you Kevin? Now remember what we said last week. Control the rage. Deep breathes. IN through the nose and out …"


The enraged youth doesn't let the patronising specialist finish his sentence, instead he screams "PINGVINAS!"

There is a wet sounding Wooophf, a fizzle and then the room is filled with the distinct smell of sardines as the doctor is replaced with a Gentoo penguin. Kevin giggles, he's always liked penguins and is tempted to stick around and play with it for a while. Knowing how angry Doctor Connors is going to be when he regains his humanity, he thinks better of it and promises himself he'll conjure one up later.

Slipping out of the treatment room and into the corridor, Kevin almost walks straight into a girl stood staring at her feet. "Your shoes look like Ladybirds." He says to her.

"You're appointment finished forty nine minutes too early." She says without looking up.

"Yeah that's a bit fishy isn't it?" Kevin giggles as he runs off down the corridor.

As he rounds the corner, the girl starts screaming.

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